I apologize for the lack of a Family Affair Friday post this week. I thought I could get one done, but I’ve just been too swamped with my own family responsibilities. I promise that I will get back on track next week. Thank you for your interest in this series!
Family Affair Friday: Season 2, Episode 1, “Birds, Bees and Buffy,” 9/11/1967
Written by: Phil Davis. Directed by: Charles Barton.
We’ve reached Season 2 of Family Affair! Let’s take a quick look around and see if anything has changed.
Well, after 30 episodes with William D. Russell, we have a new director. Don’t expect any art-house innovations, though.
Cissy’s looking prettier, I think. Her hair is fluffier.
Buffy’s front teeth have finally come in. I think Uncle Bill had better set aside some money for future orthodontia.
Jody’s gotten taller, sprouting past his sister’s height. It’s hard to believe that Anissa Jones was 9 at this time, while Johnnie Whitaker was not yet 8.
One thing hasn’t changed since Season 1: Buffy and Jody are still 6. They are old enough, though, to start asking some questions after they see French and his nanny friends admiring a baby in the park.
Meet Anthony Bartlow III.
When Buffy and Jody ask French where babies come from, he gives them a quick brush-off. Then he and the nannies marinate silently in their embarrassment.
No sex education, please. We’re British.
Meanwhile, the twins’ friend Wendy tells them that she knows where babies come from, but she’s not allowed to repeat it. It doesn’t take her long to overcome her scruples.
The stork brings babies, Wendy announces with authority.
Upon arriving at home with the twins, French informs Uncle Bill about the twins’ curiosity.
French has a very reasonable plan for handling the situation–he proposes that Bill refuse to discuss the subject with the kids, ever. Or at least until the twins are leaving for college.
Uncle Bill is no more comfortable with the subject than French. So when Buffy and Jody float Wendy’s stork theory at the dinner table, both men latch onto it.
Seriously, Uncle Bill?
Now, let’s face it: Buffy and Jody are not the sharpest knives in the drawer, if Season 1 is anything to go by.
But even these Einsteins can look at an encyclopedia entry about storks and doubt the story they’ve been told.
Their persistent questioning drives French to consult Miss Faversham, who has more experience than he does–experience with children, I mean.
She recommends the cabbage patch story as a delightful fantasy that is “not nearly as vulnerable to logic.”
The twins accept the cabbage patch story, more or less.
Unfortunately, they are eager to share their newfound knowledge with their friend Richard
Eavesdropping on their conversation, Uncle Bill cringes at the twins’ avowals that the story must be true–Uncle Bill would never lie to them, they say.
Later, he gets an earful from Richard’s mother, who believes in giving her son–gasp!–actual facts about reproduction.
Cissy is exasperated with what she calls “plain cowardice” on Uncle Bill’s part. She gets some advice and literature from her biology teacher, and tries to persuade her uncle to have a straightforward talk with the twins.
She’s fighting a losing battle. Bill can’t even handle a straightforward conversation with her on this topic.
That evening at bedtime, Bill announces that he will tell the kids the truth.
Babies come from love, he says, reminding the twins about the love their parents had for them and for each other.
Cissy and the twins are moved by his comments.
Even French approves.
Later, though, French has a question: Is “love” also the proper explanation to give the children about a friend’s rapidly increasing pet rabbit population?
Commentary
A sweet and funny treatment of an always awkward situation. I like the rabbit question at the end–it hints that Uncle Bill’s oblique explanation will only satisfy the kids for so long. He needs to get himself a copy of Dr. Spock, fast.
Guest Cast
Miss Pringle: Viola Harris. Miss Livingstone: Athena Lorde. Miss Graham: Pauline Drake. Richard: Randy Whipple. Wendy: Pamelyn Ferdin. Miss Faversham: Heather Angel. Drake, Whipple, Ferdin, and Angel all appear in multiple Family Affair episodes.
Continuity Notes
The kids’ mother and father are mentioned.
Inconsistency Alert
A visual one:
This is supposed to be Cissy’s mid-town Manhattan high school!
Fun Facts
Infants terrify Mr. French.
Spin Again Sunday: What Shall I Be? (1972)
Spin Again Sunday is back! After a long hiatus–for which I apologize–I return with a game that explores the full gamut of careers available to women–ballerina, airline stewardess, teacher, model, nurse, and actress.
Actually, by 1972, even the good people at Selchow and Righter (who also brought us The Bride Game and The Emily Post Popularity Game) realized that their game was slightly retrograde. They could have opted to redesign the whole the game, but that probably would have cost a lot of money. Instead, they reissued their 1966 game board but added this disclaimer to the inside lid:
I suppose they figured that would keep Gloria Steinem off their backs.
This Week’s Game: What Shall I Be? The Exciting Game of Career Girls
Manufactured: 1972, Selchow & Righter
Recommended For: Girls ages 8-13
Game Board: Drawings on the board–copyright 1966–show somewhat more conservative versions of the career girls than the full color photos on the 1972 box.
Game Pieces: The pawns are your basic colored plastic items. The game also involves three kinds of cards. School Cards represent the formal training needed for each career.
Players also need to collect round Subject Cards and heart-shaped Personality Cards that support their career ambitions. (As you can see, cards can also work against success in certain careers. No fat chicks need apply for stewardess!)
Game Play: Players move around the board and collect cards according to the spaces on which they land. The first player who collects four school cards for one profession, plus two Subject Cards and two Personality Cards that support that profession wins.
My Verdict: As silly as it seems now, this game would have appealed to me when I was 8 or so. Remember those cheap toy doctor’s and nurse’s kits that you could buy anywhere? My mom was always trying to raise my consciousness by buying me the doctor one, but I always wanted the nurse version.
Other Spin Again Sunday posts you might enjoy
Family Affair Friday: Season 1, Episode 30, “The Butler Method,” May 15, 1967
With this episode, we reach the end of Family Affair‘s first season! Thanks to all of you who have followed along so far. The second season includes some of my favorite episodes, so I’m excited to get it under way next week.
Written by: George Tibbles. Directed by: William D. Russell.
Synopsis
Two threads run through this episode and come together by the end–almost.
First, a well known actor friend of Uncle Bill’s is observing French to prepare for a theatrical role.
Guess who’s coming to dinner?
Second, Cissy is indecisive about her choice for a Sadie Hawkins-type dance.
Luckily for Cissy, she has a friend to help her through this crisis. Unluckily for Cissy, it’s Wanda, who is an even bigger nuisance than Cissy’s other friends.
Cissy hesitates too long in finding a date and misses out on the desirable boys. Wanda, who acts more quickly, lands a good catch.
Yep, this is definitely a work of fiction.
Uncle Bill reminisces to his house guest about his own Sadie Hawkins experiences. Even back then, it seams, he had to fight the girls off with a stick. Sometimes he would go as far as claiming a broken leg to avoid “dancing with a giraffe.” Real nice, Bill!
In the featurette included with the Season 1 DVDs, Kathy Garver says that Brian Keith would avoid making eye contact with guest stars he didn’t like. I get the feeling throughout this episode that Christopher Dark isn’t a personal favorite of his.
When Cissy finally stoops so low as calling her last-resort boy, Virgil, he has to decline: It seems he has a broken leg.
Cissy takes this news about as well as a careful viewer of Season 1 would expect.
Believing that Virgil is lying, Cissy takes to moping around the apartment.
Wanda helps Cissy’s funk along by showing off her own dress for the dance and offering to tell Cissy all about the fun she’ll be missing.
French thinks that Uncle Bill should offer to escort Cissy to the dance, and Bill does so.
Cissy declines. She has the good sense to realize that showing up at a dance with your uncle is worse than not showing up at all.
Eventually, another answer to the problem dawns on Uncle Bill–he asks his celebrity friend to escort her.
Cissy surprises everyone by turning the actor down. He’s way too old–or, she puts it, she’s way too young.
Uncle Bill finds his friend’s discomfort rather amusing.
Just then, Virgil appears at the Davis door with a very real broken leg and a doctor’s permission to attend the dance anyway.
That night, Cissy and Virgil are all smiles as they head off for the dance. Apparently, Cissy has forgotten that she didn’t want to ask Virgil in the first place.
As you can see, the twins don’t figure much in this episode’s plot. They do have a cute running gag, however.
At the beginning of the episode, they leave their school books on the hall table.
In response, they receive an intense French glare.
“He’s yelling at us with his eyes,” Buffy whispers to Jody, just before the kids scoop the books up.
Later, Cissy and Wanda leave their books on the table, and French fails to react.
Buffy and Jody are quick to point out the injustice.
Near the end of the episode, they let themselves in after school and observe that French is nowhere to be seen.
For a few seconds, they glory in their freedom.
Then their own sense of responsibility kicks in, and they pick the books up.
French is amusing when he describes his efforts to keep the twins happy while Wanda sleeps over with Cissy for two nights. He manages to convince an exiled Buffy to play “hotel” in Jody’s room the first night, but by the second night his game of “castle” fails to keep the peace.
Commentary
This episode seems to head in a very predictable direction.The “date-with-a-middle-aged celebrity” idea is the kind of thing that usually makes sense to everyone in old sitcoms, even though it would be make for a very strange occurrence in real life. Cissy’s refusal to go out with the movie star saves this episode.
Also, it’s always nice to see Cissy prettied up for a big date.
Guest Cast
Orson: Christopher Dark. Virgil: Patrick Moore. Wanda: Lynette Winter. Patrick Moore would appear one more time on Family Affair, and then vanish from the world of screen acting forever. Christopher Dark’s TV appearances include many westerns and two episodes of The Rogues, in which John Williams–the other Mr. French–had a regular role. Winter is familiar from her role as best friend LaRue in the series Gidget and as Henrietta Plout on Petticoat Junction. She also had a small part in The Parent Trap, but she didn’t share any screen time with Brian Keith.
Winter’s character in this episode is supposed to be annoying–and, boy, does she nail it.
Fun Facts
French isn’t a movie buff. He only likes to watch Sir Laurence Olivier in Hamlet and color footage of the coronation. Oh, French.
Burning Question
Isn’t a fake broken leg a particularly lame excuse? You would have to keep the ruse up at school for a fairly long time.
Also, if Bill was so popular, why did he once have to take his aunt as his date to a track meet?
Family Affair Friday(ish): Season 1, Episode 29, “The Award,” 5/2/1969
Welcome to this Easter weekend edition of Family Affair Friday! Best wishes to everyone who is celebrating the holiday.
Written by: Edmund Beloin and Henry Garson. Directed by: William D. Russell.
Synopsis
This week’s Davis family adventure opens upon a gushing Cissy.
Her facial expression in this capture just cracks me up.
She’s telling a friend about a brilliant and successful male of her acquaintance. Uncle Bill assumes she’s talking about a boyfriend, but when she hangs up, she tells him that he was the subject of her conversation. She’s impressed by the huge, gaudy trophy he’s received for “best achievement in construction engineering.”
Bill is irritated to learn that Buffy and Jody are attending a Punch and Judy show with Mr. French. It’s Thursday, Mr. French’s day off.
When they return, Bill gives French a talking to about letting the twins cajole him into giving up his day off.
French shows an unusually soft side here. “They’re nice kids,” he says.
Bill agrees, but he adds that the kids shouldn’t run everyone’s lives. To make his point, he informs the twins that he will be too busy to read to them after dinner.
“You kids have got to stop thinking about yourselves all the time,” he tells them. Making himself unavailable on a day when French has already assumed extra child-care duties seems like a strange way of getting this point across. (After this conversation, French heads off to make dinner. Maybe “day off” meant something different in the ’60s than it does now.)
The twins take Uncle Bill’s comments in stride and head to the den to watch Captain Hippopotamus. Cissy is already in there, trying to find a home for Uncle Bill’s trophy. (The den is a good idea. The trophy won’t make the room look any worse.)
After Cissy leaves, the twins decide they will make Uncle Bill an award for being the world’s best uncle. Jody borrows some modeling clay from his friend Peter, and they get to work on the award that night.
Buffy’s job is making the card, while Jody is sculpting a model of the earth. Since this is basically a big ball, it’s surprisingly how long it takes them to complete this project.
Of course, they have to deal with many interruptions. For example, Uncle Bill comes in to continue his lesson on consideration for others. He informs the twins that he will not be taking them to the zoo over the weekend.
Buffy and Jody are not impressed.
Actually, they don’t really care. They’re just eager for him to leave so they can get back to working on their project.
The next morning, Jody is doing a lot of scratching at the breakfast table. A concerned French mentions the issue to Uncle Bill, who agrees that a trip to the pediatrician is in order. Bill’s not worried enough to take Jody himself, of course–that’s French’s job.
Their doctor’s lobby is cute, but surprisingly empty. They don’t even have to sit down and wait–they walk right in.
The doctor says he will have to run allergy tests on Jody. Unfortunately, he also causes a lot of trouble by suggesting that itching is frequently caused by trauma or frustration.(I can see now why his office is so empty.)
I don’t think I’ve ever seen a doctor’s office lined with old, musty books. I’m surprised that his walls aren’t Family Affair green. They’re Jody’s room blue.
French passes along the doctor’s suggestion to Uncle Bill, who immediately decides that his refusal to take the kids to the zoo caused the rash. He reverses his decision about the outing, which dismays the twins–they want more time to work on their project.
At the zoo, Bill is perplexed–Jody is still scratching, and Buffy starts doing it, too. (I know thing were formal in 1960s, especially in big cities, but isn’t Jody’s suit a little much for the zoo? Even Uncle Bill ditches his tie for the occasion.)
Later, at the apartment, the pediatrician drops by with a likely explanation for the problem–an allergy to modeling clay. It seems he’s been treating the Davises’ neighbor Peter for the same problem. (What the heck was in that clay?)
When Uncle Bill asks the twins if they’ve been playing with Peter’s modeling clay, they make an earnest denial. The doctor, however, notices something.
They’re caught clay-handed.
Uncle Bill is angry and sad that the twins have lied to him for the first time. Soon, however, the twins present him with their finished award.
Uncle Bill grows misty reading the card: “To the bestest, nicest, terrificest uncle in the world.”
They didn’t lie to him; they were working with the clay, not playing with it, the twins explain innocently.
Awww.
Commentary
I always enjoy shows in which parents punish kids for something that turns out to be selfless behavior–this is just like the “Father of the Year” episode of The Brady Bunch. I guess it’s my inner child that still likes to see authority figures have to eat their words.
Guest Cast
Dr. Felsom: Oliver McGowan. Miss Dana: Templeton Fox. Here’s a coincidence: McGowan was in the “Father of the Year” episode of The Brady Bunch. He’ll appear again as a doctor on Family Affair. Templeton Fox was the mother of Fleetwood Mac guitarist Bob Welch.
Notable Quotes
“Young ladies of breeding do not say ‘bopped.'”–French
This Week’s Bonus Feature
Photoplay, August 1969 (Normally, I crop out the ads, but the one atop the fourth page intrigues me so. “Delayed menstruation”? Hmm.)
Family Affair Friday(ish): Season 1, Episode 28, “What Did You Do in the West, Uncle?,” 4/25/1967
Welcome to Family Affair Friday–or, as I should probably call it, Family Affair at Whatever Point During the Weekend That I Have Time to Complete It. That’s a little unwieldy, though. I do promise that I will try to avoid being so late with future installments.
Written by: Joseph Hoffman. Directed by: William D. Russell.
Our episode opens at the Davis breakfast table, as Bill tells French about his plans for the upcoming week–he’s taking a vacation from work to spend time doing fun stuff with the kids. They’re on vacation from school, apparently. Didn’t they just have spring break a few episodes ago?
Reading the paper, Bill notices that the rodeo is in town and decides that will be the first of the week’s activities. (Isn’t that some cute mid-century dinnerware on the table?)
Cissy quickly bails on Bill’s Week o’ Fun–she’s going to spend the week with a friend on Long Island. The twins, though, are excited about attending the rodeo.
French declines to join them; watching someone ride a bull gives him “a touch of vertigo and a wave of sympathy.” I always enjoy a great French line.
They have fun watching the show, and Bill becomes excited when he realizes that his old friend Gabe Nelson is among the performers. (I found myself wondering about the three guys behind them. Did they all come together? They seem rather subdued.)
Bill takes the kids backstage after the show to introduce them to his friend.
The kids are thrilled to meet a “real, live cowboy,” and Uncle Bill invites his friend to stay at the Davis apartment.
French is less thrilled to welcome this house guest, especially when Gabe calls him “Jeeves.”
He doesn’t care for Gabe’s culinary ventures either.
Steak isn’t French’s idea of a breakfast food.
I find myself sharing French’s reaction to Gabe.
The kids love him, though, especially when he gives them a “bucking bronc” experience in the living room.
This scene is fun…
…so fun that I can’t choose just one image to share.
Unfortunately, Gabe begins to monopolize the kids’ time. They spend the entire next day at the rodeo with him, and Gabe asks Bill if they can stay for the evening show, as well. Neither Gabe nor the kids know that Bill had planned to take the twins to a performance of Hansel and Gretel.
(Another Good Frenchism: “The twins will enjoy Hansel and Gretel. There’s a great deal of violence in it.”)
Bill is so bummed that he returns to the office the next day, which provides our first Ted Gaynor sighting in quite a while.
As usual, Ted’s role is to make Bill feel even worse about whatever problem he’s enduring.
Bill is determined that he and the kids will follow through with the next day’s activity–a helicopter ride over Manhattan.
The kids return from their latest trip to the rodeo in adorable costumes–and they’re excited about their plans to visit the railroad yard with “Uncle Gabe” the next day to watch more animals arrive.
Uncle Bill swallows disappointment about yet another change in plans. Fortunately, French takes the bull by the horns, so to speak–he simply explains the situation to Gabe. Straightforward communication? What a rarity on a sit com!
Gabe and French have this conversation while French rubs Gabe’s aching muscles with liniment. Is this really in French’s job description?!
Gabe tries to help by telling the twins an outlandish story about Uncle Bill fighting a grizzly bear.
When they later repeat the story to Bill, he’s bemused, to say the least.
After talking to Gabe, Bill explains to the kids that Gabe exaggerated the story in order to make Bill seem like more a hero in the kids’ eyes.
The twins are amazed that Uncle Bill felt that Gabe was replacing him in their affections. “We like Uncle Gabe. We love you,” Buffy explains in a matter-of-fact way.
At episode’s end, Uncle Bill tells French to order three tickets for a rescheduled ride over Manhattan–and four tickets for Hansel and Gretel.
The fourth ticket is for French, who had already expressed a lack of interest in attending the play. This seems a little mean on Bill’s part. At the very least, he should’ve included French in the helicopter ride, too.
Commentary
Although Gabe gets on my nerves, this is a nice episode. We’ve seen the kids deal with their insecurities about their new family situation–it’s interesting to see that Bill has insecurities, too.
Buffy and Jody are just too cute in their Western garb.
Random fashion note: I like this Buffy suit–I don’t think we’ve seen it before.
Guest Cast
Gabe Nelson: John Agar. Ted Gaynor: John Hubbard.
John Agar
John Agar jumped into the spotlight when he married Shirley Temple in 1945. His first film was Fort Apache (1948), which starred John Wayne, Henry Fonda, and Temple. His marriage to Temple was short-lived, but he went on to appear in many movies, particularly Western and sci-fi films.
Fun Facts
When he was young and broke, before he started college, Uncle Bill worked in Montana. He has ridden a buckin’ bronc.
Continuity Notes
Uncle Bill mentions his brother.
Notable Quotes
“Well, I can fight a girl bear.”–Buffy, responding to Jody’s assertion that she can’t fight a bear because she’s a girl
Family Affair Friday(ish): Season 1, Episode 27, “The Prize,” 4/10/1967
Welcome to this delayed edition of Family Affair Friday. The delivery of my new laptop has been delayed indefinitely, so I’m writing this post under difficult conditions. I hope I don’t do a ba-a-a-a-a-a-d job.
Season 1, Episode 27, “The Prize,” 4/10/1967
Written by: Henry Garson and Edmund Beloin. Directed by: William D. Russell.
Synopsis
The real Mr. French is back!
At first glance, he seems to have gotten a little sloppy, leaving the Crispy Flakes box on the table like that. Don’t worry–the box is actually there to inspire Buffy and Jody.
The twins are entering a Crispy Flakes contest because they want to win a houseboat (nice prize!) They have to describe why they like the cereal in 10 worlds.
Jody’s idea: “I like Crispy Flakes because they’re good, good, good, good.”
Uncle Bill leaves to spend a couple of days working in Tampa, and that Crispy Flakes is must be one efficient outlet because they name their winners before he gets back!
The hairiest man alive calls the Davis household to announce that Buffy and Jody won a prize. (Seriously, check out that arm. Ewwww.)
Unfortunately, they didn’t win the houseboat. Actually, they have the choice of two prizes–an encyclopedia set or a baby lamb. Now, no adult would choose the baby lamb, and no child would choose the encyclopedia set. I’m sure the Crispy Flakes people will insist on talking to a parent about this choice.
Or not.
Next thing you know, there’s a delivery man at the door.
Oh, how I missed those Cabotian reactions.
Jody and Buffy fall in love with the lamb, of course. I don’t blame them–it’s adorable!
Poor French is left to consider practical matters, like where and how to keep the lamb.
Uncle Bill, reached by phone, doesn’t offer French much guidance. It’s easy to take things like lambs in stride when you’re hundreds of miles away.
By the way, his Tampa work space looks a lot like every other out-of-town work site he’s visited.
Buffy and Jody name the lamb Snowball and do their best to take care of it. An old-school wooden playpen, borrowed from Miss Faversham, becomes its new home.
When Uncle Bill returns to New York, he tells French that he plans to donate the lamb to the Children’s Zoo. His first attempt at breaking the news to Buffy and Jody fails, however.
“We’re going to take care of him forever and ever,” Buffy says. “Just like you take care of us,” Jody adds.
Well, it would take a strong man to overcome such cuteness.
May I digress from the plot for a second? Would it be so difficult for Uncle Bill to carry his own suitcase to his room when he returns from Tampa? French has been up to his neck with kids and lambs, for God’s sake.
That night, it becomes apparent that the Snowball situation is unworkable. Left on the terrace, a lonely Snowball engages in some pitiful bleating.
Poor Snowball.
Uncle Bill’s neighbors are not exactly sympathetic to the lamb’s plight–or the Davises’.
The only thing that quiets Snowball is the reassuring presence of Mr. French. Guess who has to sleep on the terrace?
Here’s French, questioning his life choices. Bill couldn’t have brought him a pillow and blanket? He’s going to wake up with wicker marks on his face.
The next morning, Buffy and Jody take Snowball for a walk before anyone else gets up. I did wonder where Snowball was, um, relieving himself. But I also wonder whether two six-year-olds should be wandering the streets of Manhattan with only a lamb for protection.
They don’t even have the lamb for long. “Snowball runned away,” as Buffy says during one of her stupider moments.
Uncle Bill becomes concerned when the kids are still gone after two hours. He gets a call from the Humane Society, which picked up Snowball in the park. The dejected twins return to the apartment a few minutes later, but they are glad to hear that Snowball has been found.
Uncle Bill takes the kids to see Snowball at the very Family-Affair-green Humane Society. Now, how and why the Humane Society has that little farmyard set-up in the middle of their floor, I can’t imagine.
Uncle Bill tells the kids how lonely Snowball has been for other lambs, and he gently guides them into embracing the Children’s Zoo ideas as their own. His parenting skills are really growing!
Commentary
I love the lamb and the tender way Buffy and Jody care for it. Buffy even gives Snowball Mrs. Beasley’s blanket to sleep with. It’s also fun to see Sebastian Cabot again.
He’s barely accepted his role as a nanny–he’s far from ready to be a “lamb nanny.”
Guest Cast
George: William Kendis. Mrs. Mayfield: Jenifer Lea. Mr. Fisk: Olan Soule. Mr. Smith: Paul Kent. Messenger Boy: Robert Broyles. Secretary: Annette Cabot. Kent had a recurring role as Carter on TJ Hooker and appeared in many TV movies, including Helter Skelter. He also had a part in Star Trek: The Wrath of Kahn.
In the world of television, Olan Soule appeared in everything…absolutely everything. Trust me.
He also voiced Batman in several animated series, including Superfriends; recurring Family Affair guest star Sherry Alberoni voiced Wendy in that series.
Annette Cabot, playing the Wolfman’s secretary, is the daughter of Sebastian Cabot.
Continuity Notes
Cissy refers to the Velvet Vultures. (She calls them “the epitome of folk jazz.”)
Embarrassing Treasures 