Tag Archives: 1960s

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Family Affair Friday(ish): Season 2, Episode 6, “The Candy Striper,” 10/16/1967

Written by: John McGreevey and Jerry Devine. Story by: Jerry Devine. Directed by: William D. Russell.

And now we come to the episode that made such a big impression on me when I was little.

It begins with Uncle Bill awakening and bellowing for French.

Judging from the speed at which French responds, he has apparently been waiting outside Bill's door with orange juice and the newspaper.

Judging from the speed at which French responds, he has apparently been lurking right outside Bill’s door with orange juice and the newspaper.

Bill thinks he’s late for work, until French reminds him that it’s Saturday. Bill fantasizes about spending the whole day relaxing in bed–it has apparently slipped his mind that he’s a parent now.

Not to worry: The kids are quick to remind him. First, Jody barges in and tells him about a problem he’s having with his two best friends, Pete and Herbert.

I'm just glad to hear that Jody has friends. Although, come to think of it, we never actually see Pete and Herbert in this episode.

I’m just glad to hear that Jody has friends. Although, come to think of it, we never actually see Pete and Herbert in this episode.

Cissy enters and chastises Jody for bothering Uncle Bill–then she proceeds to tell her uncle about her own dilemma.

You see, Cissy wants to be a hospital volunteer--a "candy striper." But she's a few months shy of the minimum age--16--so she needs Uncle Bill to intercede for her.

You see, Cissy wants to be a hospital volunteer–a “candy striper.” But she’s a few months shy of the minimum age–16–so she needs Uncle Bill to intercede for her.

He agrees, even though it means giving up his Saturday morning to meet with the hospital administrator. Well, at least he has his afternoon free.

Or not.

Or not.

Buffy also wants to join a new activity–the Brownies. When Uncle Bill asks what a Brownie is, she responds that it’s what you are before you are a Girl Scout. (That was true then, and in the following decade when I participated. To me, it was a dull, three-year purgatory I had to endure before earning my spiffy green uniform and the ability to earn badges and sell cookies. Today, Brownies and even younger girls–Daisies–are full-fledged Girl Scouts themselves.)

Bill agrees to take Buffy to Brownie meeting that afternoon.

First, though, he has a successful meeting with the hospital administrator and tells a jubilant Cissy that she can be a volunteer. (Continuity alert: Cissy's friend Sharon is also a candy-striper.)

First, though, he has a successful meeting with the hospital administrator and tells a jubilant Cissy that she can be a volunteer. (Continuity alert: Cissy’s friend Sharon is also a candy-striper.)

When Cissy reports for duty, the nurse in charge stresses one rule--don't give patients food or drink without permission from a doctor or nurse. Do you hear that, Cissy?!

When Cissy reports for duty, the nurse in charge stresses one rule–don’t give patients food or drink without permission from a doctor or nurse. Do you hear that, Cissy?!

Meanwhile, Uncle Bill takes Buffy to meet her prospective Brownie leader.

Oh, dear lord. If leaders had to wear uniforms like that today, one particular troop in my town would be short at least one leader.

Oh, dear lord. If leaders had to wear uniforms like that today, one particular troop in my town would be short at least one leader.

Although Bill hopes to make a quick exit, the leader encourages him to stay for the meeting.

He's not uncomfortable in that environment at all.

He’s not at all uncomfortable in that environment.

Unlike her uncle, Buffy has a great time at the meeting, and it's clear that she can't wait to join the troop.

Unlike her uncle, Buffy has a great time at the meeting, and it’s clear that she can’t wait to join the troop.

(My 1970s Brownie uniform was a little different from the one these girls are wearing, but the hat was the same.)

Soon Buffy is sporting her own uniform, carrying her (authentic) Brownie manual, and practicing the pledge.

Jody is not impressed. He says he'd rather be a Marine...or a Cub Scout.

Jody is not impressed. He says he’d rather be a Marine…or a Cub Scout.

Jody has bigger problems when Cissy returns from her first day as a candy-striper: She’s so taken with the idea of nursing that she takes one sneeze from Jody as cause for alarm.

During her next session at the hospital, Cissy faces a more serious test.

This pitiful sounding old woman begs Cissy for a glass of water--and a sympathetic Cissy hurries off to get one.

This pitiful sounding old woman begs Cissy for a glass of water–and a sympathetic Cissy hurries off to get one.

Uh-oh.

Fortunately, the head nurse catches her before she gives the patient any water. She can’t have any because she’s awaiting surgery, the nurse explains to Cissy. Giving her water would have forced the doctor to delay the procedure–a delay that could have had serious consequences.

Cissy feels awful, of course, and a pep talk from Uncle Bill about moving on after mistakes only comforts her a little. The next day, she figures her career in stripes is over when her name is missing from duty roster.

She's thrilled when the head nurse tells her that she's merely been transferred to another floor--the maternity ward.

She’s thrilled when the head nurse tells her that she’s merely been transferred to another floor–the maternity ward.

She redeems herself by comforting a woman who’s laboring all alone.

Her husband is in the Army, the mother-to-be tells Cissy. Oh, sure. That's what they all say.

Her husband is in the Army, the mother-to-be tells Cissy. Oh, sure. That’s what they all say.

My bad--she really does have a husband in the Army, who shows up after the birth.

My bad–she really does have a husband in the Army, who shows up after the birth.

Isn't that an odd nursery set-up, with the babies in one big bed?

Isn’t that an odd nursery set-up, with the babies in one big bed?

Cissy returns home high on nursing again and thrilled to have played a small part in the miracle of birth.

Meanwhile, Buffy has mastered the Brownie pledge and has earned two “unofficial” badges. (French wasn’t thrilled–one of them was for cooking!)

She becomes a official Brownie at a meeting in Central Park.

She becomes a official Brownie at a meeting in Central Park.

When Uncle Bill casually mentions Buffy’s age to the leader, however, things take an unfortunate turn. Buffy is only 6, and the leader says that Brownies must be 7–no exceptions.

(Time sure moves slowly in the Davis universe. None of the kids have celebrated birthdays since they arrived in New York.)

That night, Uncle Bill has to break the news to Buffy that her Brownie career is suspended until she celebrates her next birthday.

Though sad at first, she soon perks up--after all, she notes, she only has to wait 92 days.

Though sad at first, she soon perks up–after all, she notes, she only has to wait 92 days.

Commentary

This is the episode I remembered best from my childhood. At the time, I found the scene with the old woman and Cissy’s subsequent reprimand harrowing. Oddly, I had totally forgotten about the Buffy story, which now seems more moving and which was about a child much closer to my age.

I’m sure it was this episode that made me want to be a candy striper as a teen–and I did, sort of. Volunteers at our hospital didn’t wear candy-striped dresses, darn it. Just ugly burgundy smocks.

Scouting-themed episodes are common on sitcoms aimed at kids–even several of the current Disney Channel shows have done such episodes. The scouts in these episodes, though, always represent some made-up organization, like the Frontier Boys or the Sunflower Girls. I can’t think of any other show besides Family Affair that featured real Girl Scouts or Boy Scouts. I’m curious about how that happened–did the Buffy character’s great popularity with young girls convince the Girl Scouts of America to use the show as a recruiting vehicle?

It’s pretty obvious that they got some “technical advice” from the Scouts, since the portrayal was so authentic. (Even the badges Buffy is holding in the featured image atop this page are recognizably real.) The only thing I question is the age rule–membership goes by grade level now, and I’m pretty sure it did in my day, too. Otherwise, girls would be changing levels chaotically throughout the school year as they celebrated birthdays.

Guest Cast

Mrs. Russell: Alice Frost. Sharon: Sherry Alberoni. Mrs. Warren: Karen Green. Mrs. Elkins: Nydia Westman. Randy: Debi Storm. Mrs. Thompson: Audrey Dalton. Dalton made many guest appearances on TV westerns. Her film credits include 1953’s Titanic. Debi Storm made a memorable Brady Bunch appearance–she was Molly Webber, the girl Marcia made over.

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Family Affair Friday(ish): Season 2, Episode 5, “The Other Cheek,” 10/9/1967

Written by: Elroy Schwartz. Directed by: Charles Barton.

I’m ba-a-a-a-ck! I had a great vacation but I must have missed the Davis family–Brian Keith has appeared in my dreams the past two nights (and not in an entirely salacious way).

This week’s episode is an unusually violent one right from the very beginning.

The twins' fight over the rules of checkers quickly escalates, as Jody threatens to "sock" Buffy.

The twins’ fight over the rules of checkers quickly escalates, as Jody threatens to “sock” Buffy.

Buffy runs to Uncle Bill, who is reclining in his chair and reading a book. (Somehow, I don’t enjoy many such moments as a parent.)

Uncle Bill explains that Jody must never hit a girl. (Jody wonders if that goes for kicking, too. It does.)

Uncle Bill explains that Jody must never hit a girl. (Jody wonders if that goes for kicking, too. It does.)

In true TV style, Uncle Bill’s words are put to the test the very next day.

When this girl approaches Buffy to join her for lunch and share schoolroom "tattles," Buffy declines. She has to eat lunch with Jody, she explains.

When this girl approaches Buffy to join her for lunch and an exchange of schoolroom “tattles,” Buffy declines. She has to eat lunch with Jody, she explains.

Jody gives Buffy permission to desert him and settles down to eat his lunch alone. (Doesn’t he have any friends? I worry about that boy, sometimes.)

A decidedly undainty girl named Jeannie joins Jody and demands that he trade sandwiches with her.

A decidedly undainty girl named Jeannie joins Jody and demands that he trade sandwiches with her.

We get our first insight into Jeannie’s troubled home life when we see what she’s brought to school for lunch.

Gag!

Gag!

Understandably, Jody resists trading, but Jeannie won’t take no for an answer.

After school, a ravenous Jody wolfs down a decent sandwich and explains the day's events to Uncle Bill.

After school, a ravenous Jody wolfs down a decent sandwich and explains the day’s events to Uncle Bill.

Bill is proud that Jody didn’t hit Jeannie, and Jody basks in his uncle’s approval.

The next day, Jody tries to avoid Jeannie by eating lunch inside with the janitor. She finds him later, though, and expresses her displeasure.

The next day, Jody tries to avoid Jeannie by eating lunch inside with the janitor. She finds him later, though, and expresses her displeasure.

shiner

Ouch.

To her credit, Cissy steps in to protect her younger brother. She takes off for Jeannie’s neighborhood, a little slice of A Tree Grows in Brooklyn that exists somewhere between the Davis high-rise and the kids’ school.

New York really is an amazing city, isn't it?

New York really is an amazing city, isn’t it?

Things don’t go especially well for Cissy.

But let's face it--even when she puts on her bitch face, Cissy doesn't exactly ooze street cred.

Let’s face it–even when she puts on her bitch face, Cissy doesn’t exactly ooze street cred.

She tries to explain to Jeannie’s mother that Jody is in a difficult position because he knows it’s wrong to hit girls. We get a deeper insight into Jeannie’s home life from Mrs. Michaels’ reply–she says someone should tell her husband that rule. (According the laugh track, we should find that line funny.)

Jeannie's mother tells Cissy to mind her own business.

Finally, Jeannie’s mother tells Cissy to mind her own business.

Witnessing this confrontation makes Jeannie even angrier that usual.

The next day, she decks Jody for no reason at all.

The next day, she decks Jody for no reason at all.

Uncle Bill decides it’s time to step in and talk to Jeannie’s father.

Unfortunately, he finds Mr. Michaels is no more ready to engage in reasonable dialog than his daughter is.

Unfortunately, he finds Mr. Michaels is no more ready to engage in reasonable dialog than his daughter is.

Afterwards, Jody is disappointed that Uncle Bill didn’t punch the guy. Bill explains that Jody should try to talk things out with Jeannie before she hits him again. This only results in an extortion scheme–Jody agrees to provide Jeannie with sandwiches and money to keep her off his case.

Hearing this, Uncle Bill trots back to the neighborhood tenement to confront Mr. Michaels again. Jeannie’s dad seems momentarily contrite, before unloading a sucker punch on Bill.

The fight went by too quickly for me to capture any good images, but this is how it ends up.

The ensuing fight goes by too quickly for me to capture any good images, but this is how it ends up.

Afterwards, Uncle Bill feels embarrassed and hopes to hide the whole thing from the kids. (He declines French’s offer to explain the situation to Jody through a lecture on the dangers of “craven appeasement.” I love French.)

Word spreads quickly at school, of course, and the twins report happily to their uncle that his forceful action has made Jeannie back down. They enlighten him a bit about the rules of the school-yard, where words aren’t as important as actions.

We have one of our requisite sweet endings. Sigh.

We have one of our requisite sweet endings. Sigh. Is it any wonder that I dream about this guy?

All’s well that ends well, except maybe for Jeannie and her violent, impoverished family. I’m guessing she’s in the women’s equivalent of Attica right now.

Commentary

What old-school family sit com didn’t have a bully episode like this? In the ineffectual attempts of family members to find a reasonable solution, this reminds me of the Buddy Hinton episode of The Brady Bunch. (Elroy Schwartz, who wrote this episode, was the brother of Brady Bunch creator Sherwood Schwartz. He wrote several episodes of that series, but not the Buddy Hinton one.)

Guest Cast

Girl: Kellie Flanagan. Mr. Michaels: Sean McClory. Mrs. Michaels: Kathleen O’Malley. Jeannie: Claire Wilcox.

Flanagan, McClory, O’Malley. They should have aired this one on St. Patrick’s Day.

Flanagan was Candice in the TV series The Ghost and Mrs. Muir. (That’s a show I’d love to see again.)

Claire Wilcox was active as a child actress throughout the 1960s, but she dropped out of sight after a couple of Partridge Family appearances.

Fun Facts

Jody only likes sardines that are “naked”–lacking heads and tails.

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Family Affair Friday(ish): Season 2, Episode 4, “Arthur the Invisible Bear,” 10/2/1967

Written by: John McGreevey. Directed by: Charles Barton.

Synopsis

Uh-oh! Jody’s delusional again!

Uncle Bill returns from a one-night trip out of town to learn that Jody has acquired an invisible companion–Arthur the bear. Bill figures Jody will forget about the bear by breakfast time the next morning.

Not exactly.

Not exactly. Arthur is a guest at the Davis table.

French is annoyed with this new addition to the family, but he hasn’t seen anything yet. Arthur is a rather disruptive bear.

Jody uses a whole bottle of Cissy's hair spray on Arthur's fur. She's rightfully annoyed--she probably goes through a bottle a day herself shellacking that flip into position.

Jody uses a whole bottle of Cissy’s hair spray on Arthur’s fur. She’s rightfully annoyed–she probably goes through a bottle a day herself shellacking that flip into position.

Buffy suffers, too. She feels left out when Jody is playing with Arthur.

Arthur even violates the sanctity of French’s bedroom.

I'm feeling his pain, here.

I’m feeling his pain here.

Most alarmingly, Arthur invades the twins’ classroom and causes a major disruption.

The teacher ends up sending the twins home early. (I understand her frustration, but that seems like a drastic solution.)

The teacher ends up sending the twins home early.

I understand her frustration, but that seems like a drastic solution.

Imagine how that would go over today–sending kids home early for misbehaving.

Bill, who initially saw Arthur as Jody’s equivalent to Mrs. Beasley, grows concerned. Jody ends up in a place where I suspect he’ll be spending a lot of time later in life–a psychologist’s office.

She says the well-behaved Jody is using Arthur to act out his hatreds and hostilities. She encourages the rest of the family to accept Arthur.

She says the well-behaved Jody is using Arthur to act out his hatreds and hostilities. She encourages the rest of the family to accept Arthur. (Her office is Family Affair green! Everyone take a drink!)

The family tries to follow her advice, but everyone finds it taxing. Eventually, Bill has a heart-to-heart talk with Jody and comes to the conclusion that the boy is well-adjusted.

Our first "awww..." moment of the Season 2.

Our first “‘Awww…” moment of the Season 2.

Bill drives the whole family out to a barren hellscape, where Arthur is released.

Arthur, we hardly knew ye.

Arthur, we hardly knew ye.

We end with one of those sitcom “Could it be?” moments, as French believes he sees a bear running away.

Commentary

On old radio and TV shows, child psychologists are buffoons who fail to realize that parenting just requires good old-fashioned common sense. I think I’m with the psychologist here, though. An imaginary friend carried to the point of disrupting the classroom would worry me.

Guest Cast

Dr. Dorothy Cramer: Adrienne Marden. Miss Ainsley: Mitzi Hoag. Sue Evelyn: Susan Marie Benjamin. Howard: Kevin Cooper. Hoag had regular roles on the series Hawaii Five-O and Here Come the Brides.

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Family Affair Friday(ish): Season 2, Episode 3, “Go Home, Mr. French,” 9/25/1967

Written by: Fred S. Fox. and Seaman Davis. Directed by: Charles Barton.

 Synopsis

As in last week’s episode, we open with romance in the air at Central Park.

pallid youth

While on an outing with Buffy and Jody, Mr. French is shocked to run into old flame Lorna Frazier, who is accompanied by two pallid products of the British aristocracy.

French and Lorna worked together on the staff of the Duke and Duchess of Glenmore. She’s visiting New York with the Duke and Duchess and their children.

Returning home, Buffy and Jody waste no time telling Uncle Bill about French’s old friend and how pretty she is.

knowing

“You sly dog,” Uncle Bill appears to be thinking here.

Bill is less amused when the Duke tracks him down at a construction site and says he wants to hire French back. He’s offering French an executive position on the staff, and urges Bill to let French feel as if he can take it.

While reminiscing and pondering whether to leave the Davis family, French thumbs through some old photo albums.

This is a beardless French.

This is a beardless French.

This is French and Lorna at Brighton--a place where, I gather, chimps are freely available for fondling.

This is French and Lorna at Brighton–a place where, I gather, chimps are freely available for fondling.

This is the Glenmore estate, where French was born and where three previous generations of French men served.

This is the Glenmore estate, where French was born and where three previous generations of French men served.

(French says he left the estate and Lorna behind because he was eager to come to America. I’m baffled why someone as uber-British as French would want to make that move, especially since being a one-man staff to an engineer seems like a big step down. I’d love to hear my readers’ theories–especially if they’re salacious.)

Bill calls a hasty family meeting and tells the kids that they cant stand in French's way. Oh, no, they're not going to do that old sitcom thing where they try to make French feel like they don't need him, are they?

Bill calls a hasty family meeting and tells the kids that they cant stand in French’s way. Oh, no, they’re not going to do that old sitcom thing where they try to make French feel like they don’t need him, are they?

Yeah, they totally are.

Soon the twins are reading their own bedtime stories.

Soon the twins are reading their own bedtime stories.

Uncle Bill even starts dressing himself!

Uncle Bill even starts dressing himself!

To French’s credit, he sees through the family’s new-found independence. But torn between wanting to stay and wanting to be near Lorna again, he decides to accept the Duke’s offer.

No sooner has he decided, however, than he’s waffling again. Bill observes that French has a hard time saying goodbye to the kids.

As a going-away gift, they give him "military brushes." That's a thing, apparently.

As a going-away gift, they give him “military brushes.” That’s a thing, apparently.

Soon Uncle Bill’s off to see the Duke, requesting that he give French a chance to change his mind. (Convincing French to leave, helping French to stay–Bill has his hands full in this episode.)

glum

Just when the glum kids think they are about to meet French’s replacement, they get the news that he’s staying.

Though he professes to have stayed for practical reasons, the kids realize he would have missed them, and he finally admits it.

“Yay, Mr. French is giving up the chance for professional advancement and personal fulfillment to attend to our needs!”

Actually, I think French is just not that into Lorna. During their wistful farewell scene, they acknowledge that they can’t re-create the past.

French doesn't even kiss her goodbye.

French doesn’t even kiss her goodbye. As a “Fraversham” shipper, I’m okay with that.

Commentary

This episode would have bored me as a kid, and it still bores me now. French’s shifts between wanting to go and wanting to stay are too sudden to inspire any emotion.

Guest Cast

Lorna Frasier: Anna Lee. Duchess of Glenmore: Cathleen Cordell. Jonathan: Riley Mills. Elizabeth: Nicci-Ann Frank. Miss Turner: Merri Wood Taylor. Duke of Glenmore: Patric Knowles.

Anna Lee

Anna Lee

Patric Knowles’ long motion picture career included substantive roles in such movies as The Adventures of Robin Hood, Of Human Bondage, Three Came Home and Auntie Mame. He once appeared on TV’s The Rogues, in which the other Mr. French–John Williams–was a regular cast member. Anna Lee had a similarly long and distinguished career, which included playing Bronwyn in How Green Was My Valley, in which Knowles also appeared. Other movies in which she had significant roles include King Solomon’s Mines, Flying Tigers, Bedlam, The Ghost and Mrs. Muir, Fort Apache, Whatever Happened to Baby Jane? and The Sound of Music (she was Sister Margaretta, the nun most sympathetic to Maria). She may be best known today for her long-running role as Lila Quartermaine on General Hospital.

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Family Affair Friday: Season 2, Episode 2, “First Love,” 9/18/1967

Welcome back to Family Affair Friday! In this week’s episode, Cissy tries to fix second-grader Buffy up with a boy in sixth grade, while Uncle Bill sexually harrasses a work associate.

Yeah, this is a pretty weird episode.

“First Love.” Aired: 9/18/1967. Written by: Austin and Irma Kalish. Directed by: Charles Barton.

Synopsis

Our episode opens in the park, where Jody is playing football with a group of boys.

Here's a shock--Jody is actually dressed appropriately for this activity.

Here’s a shock–Jody is actually dressed appropriately for this activity!

The Barry Williamsish lad on the right is Andy, the charismatic leader of the football crowd. Andy makes a big impression on Jody–and on someone else.

Uh-oh. Are we hearing what French will later call "the first faint yappings of puppy love"?

Uh-oh. Are we hearing what French will later call “the first faint yappings of puppy love”?

While retrieving an errant football from Buffy, Andy remarks that she is “cute.” That’s a strange thing for a sixth-grade boy to say about a doll-clutching second-grade girl, so I’m going to assume he meant “cute” like a kitten or a puppy or a baby.

Buffy takes the remark differently, however. That evening, with Andy in mind, she indulges in a Cissy-style primping session.

sisterly moment

Buffy confides in Cissy about her secret crush, and they share a sweet sisterly moment.

Then things get weird: Despite knowing that her sister’s crush is in sixth grade, Cissy actively encourages Buffy to pursue this “romance.”

Meanwhile, Uncle Bill is wooing a geological consultant who just wants to discuss soil samples.

business

This gives him the chance to make lots of cringe-worthy remarks like “I know there’s a woman somewhere under that shell” while he attempts to turn every business meeting into a date.

Back at home, Buffy and Cissy convince Jody to invite Andy over to the apartment. Cissy then helps Buffy get ready for the big meeting.

Jody expresses shock at seeing Buffy "dressed up." Um, she's always dressed up, Jody. What's shocking is that turtleneck you're wearing.

Jody expresses shock at seeing Buffy “dressed up.” Um, she’s always dressed up, Jody. What’s shocking is that turtleneck you’re wearing.

When Andy arrives, Buffy almost chickens out of trying to impress him–until Cissy chides her.

"A woman has to be aggressive," Cissy says. What the?

“A woman has to be aggressive,” says Cissy, who apparently failed to notice that the woman in front of her is a little girl.

Luckily, Andy can tell the difference between a woman and a little girl, and he quickly takes an interest in the nearest thing to a woman in the Davis household–Cissy.

He starts showing off to entertain Cissy and ignores Buffy--and poor Jody, who's just trying to do some male bonding.

He starts showing off to entertain Cissy and ignores Buffy–and poor Jody, who’s just trying to do some male bonding.

Buffy doesn’t take this well.

The ensuing scene is quite a switch for Cissy--she's usually the one in the face-down position of despair.

The ensuing scene is quite a switch for Cissy–she’s usually the one in the Face-Down Position of Despair.

Uncle Bill soon has to deal with his own disappointment.

Roped into a romantic terrace dinner and unable to get Bill to focus on work, Miss Lowell finally tells him that she's engaged.

Roped into a romantic terrace dinner and unable to get Bill to focus on work, Miss Lowell finally tells him that she’s engaged.

Chagrined, Bill realizes that he should have listened to her earlier protests that she wasn’t interested. Ya think?

To his credit, he takes responsibility

To his credit, he takes responsibility instead of asking why she didn’t tell him this several non-date “dates” ago. My theory is that in the sexist 1960s work climate, she felt she had to maintain an illusion of romantic availability to get men to hire her at all. Either that or there was no fiance and she was just desperate to get Bill off her back.

(Now, personally, I wouldn’t fight too hard to discourage Uncle Bill’s advances. But, then again, I’m not Catwoman or Miss America 1955.)

After taking Miss Lowell home, Uncle Bill returns to the darkened apartment and finds a distressed Buffy on the couch. She fills him in on her crush, and they commiserate about heartache.

buffy closeup

This is a sweet scene, but it would work better if we actually saw Uncle Bill and Buffy talking together. Instead, it’s just a series of alternating closeups. Because of Brian Keith’s shortened shooting schedule, the two halves of this conversation were presumably filmed at different times.

bill closeup

Commentary

The dialogue in this episode is good. The Uncle Bill story is dated, but you have to expect such things in a show that’s almost 50 years old. The idea of Buffy having a crush is cute. The problem with this episode is the bizarre role Cissy plays. The writers could have avoided this problem so easily, too. If Cissy didn’t know Andy’s age until he showed up at the apartment, everything would make a lot more sense.

sad buffy

Anissa Jones gives a good performance here–being older than her character might have been an advantage to her, considering the subject matter. And I always love scenes where we get to see her hair down.

Guest Cast

Lise Lowell: Lee Meriwether. Andy: Joel Davison. Nanny: Towyna Thomas.

Lee Meriwether, Miss America 1955, is well known for parts on TV series like Batman and Barnaby Jones. She played Catwoman in the 1966 Batman movie. More recently, she played Ruth Martin on All My Children. And, hey–she’s on Twitter! I’m totally following her now.

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Family Affair Friday: Season 2, Episode 1, “Birds, Bees and Buffy,” 9/11/1967

Written by: Phil Davis. Directed by: Charles Barton.

We’ve reached Season 2 of Family Affair! Let’s take a quick look around and see if anything has changed.

Well, after 30 episodes with William D. Russell, we have a new director.

Well, after 30 episodes with William D. Russell, we have a new director. Don’t expect any art-house innovations, though.

Cissy's looking prettier, I think. Her hair is flufflier or something.

Cissy’s looking prettier, I think. Her hair is fluffier.

truth

Buffy’s front teeth have finally come in. I think Uncle Bill had better set aside some money for future orthodontia.

curious

Jody’s gotten taller, sprouting past his sister’s height. It’s hard to believe that Anissa Jones was 9 at this time, while Johnnie Whitaker was not yet 8.

One thing hasn’t changed since Season 1: Buffy and Jody are still 6. They are old enough, though, to start asking some questions after they see French and his nanny friends admiring a baby in the park.

Meet Anthony Bartlow III.

Meet Anthony Bartlow III.

When Buffy and Jody ask French where babies come from, he gives them a quick brush-off. Then he and the nannies marinate silently in their embarrassment.

No sex education, please. We're British.

No sex education, please. We’re British.

Meanwhile, the twins’ friend Wendy tells them that she knows where babies come from, but she’s not allowed to repeat it. It doesn’t take her long to overcome her scruples.

The stork brings babies, Wendy announces with authority.

The stork brings babies, Wendy announces with authority.

Upon arriving at home with the twins, French informs Uncle Bill about the twins’ curiosity.

French has a very reasonable plan for handling the situation--he proposes that Bill refuse to discuss the subject with the kids, ever.

French has a very reasonable plan for handling the situation–he proposes that Bill refuse to discuss the subject with the kids, ever. Or at least until the twins are leaving for college.

Uncle Bill is no more comfortable with the subject than French. So when Buffy and Jody float Wendy’s stork theory at the dinner table, both men latch onto it.

Seriously, Uncle Bill?

Seriously, Uncle Bill?

Now, let’s face it: Buffy and Jody are not the sharpest knives in the drawer, if Season 1 is anything to go by.

But even these Einsteins can look at an encyclopedia entry about storks and doubt the story they've been told.

But even these Einsteins can look at an encyclopedia entry about storks and doubt the story they’ve been told.

Their persistent questioning drives French to consult Miss Faversham, who has more experience than he does–experience with children, I mean.

She recommends the cabbage patch story as a delightful fantasy that is "not nearly as vulnerable to logic."

She recommends the cabbage patch story as a delightful fantasy that is “not nearly as vulnerable to logic.”

The twins accept the cabbage patch story, more or less.

Unfortunately, they are also eager to share their newfound knowledge with their friend Richie.

Unfortunately, they are eager to share their newfound knowledge with their friend Richard

Eavesdropping on their conversation, Uncle Bill cringes at the twins’ avowals that the story must be true–Uncle Bill would never lie to them, they say.

Later, he gets an earful from Riche's mother, who has made the radical decision to raise her

Later, he gets an earful from Richard’s mother, who believes in giving her son–gasp!–actual facts about reproduction.

Cissy is exasperated with what she calls “plain cowardice” on Uncle Bill’s part. She gets some advice and literature from her biology teacher, and tries to persuade her uncle to have a straightforward talk with the twins.

She's fighting a losing battle. Bill can't even handle a straightforward conversation with her on this topic.

She’s fighting a losing battle. Bill can’t even handle a straightforward conversation with her on this topic.

That evening at bedtime, Bill announces that he will tell the kids the truth.

Babies come from love, he says, reminding the twins about the love their parents had for them and for each other.

Babies come from love, he says, reminding the twins about the love their parents had for them and for each other.

Cissy and the twins are moved by his comments.

Even French approves.

Even French approves.

Later, though, French has a question: Is “love” also the proper explanation to give the children about a friend’s rapidly increasing pet rabbit population?

Commentary

A sweet and funny treatment of an always awkward situation. I like the rabbit question at the end–it hints that Uncle Bill’s oblique explanation will only satisfy the kids for so long. He needs to get himself a copy of Dr. Spock, fast.

Guest Cast

Miss Pringle: Viola Harris. Miss Livingstone: Athena Lorde. Miss Graham: Pauline Drake. Richard: Randy Whipple. Wendy: Pamelyn Ferdin. Miss Faversham: Heather Angel. Drake, Whipple, Ferdin, and Angel all appear in multiple Family Affair episodes.

Continuity Notes

The kids’ mother and father are mentioned.

Inconsistency Alert

A visual one:

This is supposed to be Cissy's mid-town Manhattan high school!

This is supposed to be Cissy’s mid-town Manhattan high school!

Fun Facts

Infants terrify Mr. French.

by

Family Affair Friday: Season 1, Episode 30, “The Butler Method,” May 15, 1967

With this episode, we reach the end of Family Affair‘s first season! Thanks to all of you who have followed along so far. The second season includes some of my favorite episodes, so I’m excited to get it under way next week.

Written by: George Tibbles. Directed by: William D. Russell.

Synopsis

Two threads run through this episode and come together by the end–almost.

First, a well known actor friend of Uncle Bill’s is observing French to prepare for a theatrical role.

Guess who's coming to dinner?

Guess who’s coming to dinner?

Second, Cissy is indecisive about her choice for a Sadie Hawkins-type dance.

Luckily for Cissy, she has a friend to help her through this crisis. Unluckily for Cissy, it's Wanda, who is even more annoying than Cissy's other friends.

Luckily for Cissy, she has a friend to help her through this crisis. Unluckily for Cissy, it’s Wanda, who is an even bigger nuisance than Cissy’s other friends.

Cissy hesitates too long in finding a date and misses out on the desirable boys. Wanda, who acts more quickly, lands a good catch.

Yes, this is definitely a work of fiction.

Yep, this is definitely a work of fiction.

Uncle Bill reminisces to his house guest about his own Sadie Hawkins experiences. Even back then, it seams, he had to fight the girls off with a stick. Sometimes he would go as far as claiming a broken leg to avoid “dancing with a giraffe.” Real nice, Bill!

In the featurette included with the Season 1 DVDs, Kathy Garver says that Brian Keith would avoid making eye contact with guest stars he didn't like. I get the feeling throughout this episode that Christopher Dark isn't a personal favorite of his.

In the featurette included with the Season 1 DVDs, Kathy Garver says that Brian Keith would avoid making eye contact with guest stars he didn’t like. I get the feeling throughout this episode that Christopher Dark isn’t a personal favorite of his.

When Cissy finally stoops so low as calling her last-resort boy, Virgil, he has to decline: It seems he has a broken leg.

Cissy takes this news about as well as a careful viewer of Season 1 would expect.

Cissy takes this news about as well as a careful viewer of Season 1 would expect.

Believing that Virgil is lying, Cissy takes to moping around the apartment.

Wanda helps Cissy's funk along by showing off her own dress for the dance and offering to tell Cissy all about the fun she'll be missing.

Wanda helps Cissy’s funk along by showing off her own dress for the dance and offering to tell Cissy all about the fun she’ll be missing.

French thinks that Uncle Bill should offer to escort Cissy to the dance, and Bill does so.

Cissy has the good sense to realize that showing up at a dance with your uncle is worse than not showing up at all.

Cissy declines. She has the good sense to realize that showing up at a dance with your uncle is worse than not showing up at all.

Eventually, another answer to the problem dawns on Uncle Bill–he asks his celebrity friend to escort her.

Cissy surprises everyone by turning the actor down. He's way too old--or, she puts it, she's way too young.

Cissy surprises everyone by turning the actor down. He’s way too old–or, she puts it, she’s way too young.

Uncle Bill finds his friend's discomfort rather amusing.

Uncle Bill finds his friend’s discomfort rather amusing.

Just then, Virgil appears at the Davis door with a very real broken leg and a doctor’s permission to attend the dance anyway.

That night, Cissy and Virgil are all smiles as they head off for the dance. Apparently, Cissy has forgotten that she didn't want to ask Virgil in the first place.

That night, Cissy and Virgil are all smiles as they head off for the dance. Apparently, Cissy has forgotten that she didn’t want to ask Virgil in the first place.

As you can see, the twins don’t figure much in this episode’s plot. They do have a cute running gag, however.

At the beginning of the episode, they leave their school books on the hall table.

In response, they receive an intense French glare.

In response, they receive an intense French glare.

He's yelling at us with his eyes, Buffy whispers to Jody, just before the kids scoop the books up.

“He’s yelling at us with his eyes,” Buffy whispers to Jody, just before the kids scoop the books up.

Later, Cissy and Wanda leave their books on the table, and French fails to react.

Buffy and Jody are quick to point out the injustice of this.

Buffy and Jody are quick to point out the injustice.

Near the end of the episode, they let themselves in after school and observe that French is nowhere to be seen.

For a few seconds, they glory in their freedom.

For a few seconds, they glory in their freedom.

Then their own sense of responsibility kicks in, and they pick the books up.

Then their own sense of responsibility kicks in, and they pick the books up.

French is amusing when he describes his efforts to keep the twins happy while Wanda sleeps over with Cissy for two nights. He manages to convince an exiled Buffy to play “hotel” in Jody’s room the first night, but by the second night his game of “castle” fails to keep the peace.

Commentary

This episode seems to head in a very predictable direction.The “date-with-a-middle-aged celebrity” idea is the kind of thing that usually makes sense to everyone in old sitcoms, even though it would be make for a very strange occurrence in real life. Cissy’s refusal to go out with the movie star saves this episode.

Also, it's always nice to see Cissy prettied up for a big date.

Also, it’s always nice to see Cissy prettied up for a big date.

Guest Cast

Orson: Christopher Dark. Virgil: Patrick Moore. Wanda: Lynette Winter. Patrick Moore would appear one more time on Family Affair, and then vanish from the world of screen acting forever. Christopher Dark’s TV appearances include many westerns and two episodes of The Rogues, in which John Williams–the other Mr. French–had a regular role. Winter is familiar from her role as best friend LaRue in the series Gidget and as Henrietta Plout on Petticoat Junction. She also had a small part in The Parent Trap, but she didn’t share any screen time with Brian Keith.

Winter's character in this episode is supposed to be annoying--and, boy, does she nail it.

Winter’s character in this episode is supposed to be annoying–and, boy, does she nail it.

Fun Facts

French isn’t a movie buff. He only likes to watch Sir Laurence Olivier in Hamlet and color footage of the coronation. Oh, French.

Burning Question

Isn’t a fake broken leg a particularly lame excuse? You would have to keep the ruse up at school for a fairly long time.
Also, if Bill was so popular, why did he once have to take his aunt as his date to a track meet?