It Takes a (Fisher Price Play Family) Village

The gift I’d wished the hardest for in 1974–the Fisher Price Play Family Village.

My parents captured many Christmas morning photographs when I was young, but this one from 1974 is a little unusual. Most of our Christmas photos are candids taken in the midst of our present-opening frenzy. In this one, I’m pausing to pose in front of a half-unwrapped gift. The smile on my face shows how happy I was to uncover that gift–the Fisher Price Play Family Village.

Fisher Price began producing the Village in 1973. At age 6, I longed for it as intensely as I would long for the Barbie Star Traveler a few years later. I’d loved Play Family toys since I was a toddler, and the Village was the ultimate play set, with a fire station, police station, dentist’s office, apartment, restaurant, theater, garage, and more.

I’ve been wanting to acquire a Village for years, but finding a complete one at a price I was willing to pay proved difficult. Finally, about a month ago, I was able to add this toy to my collection.

I wanted to share a few pictures of it, simply because its colorful lithography and smiling people make me happy. As much as I enjoy nostalgia, I try not to fall into the trap of pining for a simpler time. In 1974, our country was dealing with Watergate, continued involvement in Vietnam, and an oil embargo–things were anything but simple. But a toy like Play Family Village transports me to a time when my parents still stood between me and the outside world’s troubles, and daily life seemed almost as uncomplicated as a walk down Play Family Main Street.

Spin Again Sunday: Happy Days

Aaaaaayyyyyyyy. Ready for dating, drag racing, and drive-ins? Sure you are–you’re not some kind of a nerd are you?

Today’s Game: Happy Days (“Fonzie’s Real Cool Game”)

Copyright Date: 1976.

Game Box: The most striking features are neon-light-style lettering and cartoon caricatures of cast members. These caricatures are a cut above those on most games–they actually resemble their real life counterparts. Fonzie is front and center, of course, flanked by Richie and Potsie. The other Cunninghams are peeking around the jukebox. Ralph Malph is MIA.

Game Board: Colorful, if not grammatical–“Sumthin’ to do?” I do wonder why Fonzie is sitting on various houses in the corner spaces. The drag strip that cuts diagonally across the board is an original touch.

Bonus Feature: The game also includes a peg board with a rainbow-hued jukebox for tracking players’ cool points. Fonzie, Richie, and Potsie show up again here. Donny Most must have pissed off a Parker brother.

Recommended Ages: 7 to 13.

Game Play, As the Box Describes It:”See, it’s like spending time with the Fonz–you go on dates, challenge other players to drag races, or maybe just cruise down to Arnold’s. But beware, you can lose cool points as easily as you gain them. Hey, Nerd, don’t get caught hangin’ out at home. That would be uncool.”

My Thoughts: As innocent as this game is, I can’t imagine today’s parents going for it. I mean, drag racing is pretty dangerous. There are things called “score points” that you can only receive in combination with a date card–hmm. And talk about bullying–the game itself calls kids names!

Carole Lombard, October 6, 1908-January 16, 1942

Carole Lombard was born on this date in 1908. I’ve always felt that, though she certainly had Golden-Age-Hollywood glamor, she also had a strangely modern quality–I can envision her as a 21st century movie star. Dell published this special magazine in 1942 after her death.

Family Affair Friday: Episode 5, Season 1, “Marmalade”

This is part of my weekly series about the classic CBS sitcom Family Affair.

Season 1, Episode 5, “Marmalade,” 10/10/66

Written by: Henry Garson and Edmund Beloin. Directed by: William D. Russell.

Synopsis

Uncle Bill’s latest love interest, Ellen Latimer, is an advertising firm employee who thinks French would be perfect in a “small” ad for Dunholt Marmalade.

The lovely Miss Latimer

French reluctantly agrees and endures the photo shoot.

“Must I go through with this pitty-patting on my brow?”

When the resulting full-page ad attracts contempt from fellow gentleman’s gentleman Withers but adulation from the ladies, French begins to like and even court the attention.

French and his fan club

He readily agrees to a five-week national promotional tour–until he actually tastes the marmalade.

The taste

Random Thoughts

Sebastian Cabot is very funny as he runs the gamut from disdainful to enthusiastic and back in the world of advertising.

This script seems to have more funny lines than most.

The kids react to the ad:
Buffy: “He’s pretty.”
Jody: “Maybe he’s smiling ‘cause we weren’t there.”

Notable Quotes

“We are not a male model, sir.”—French

“Never let it be said that Bill Davis didn’t do his best to promote a pretty girl.”—Uncle Bill

“It might have been easier with Laurence Olivier”—Uncle Bill

Guest Cast

Ellen Latimer: Mary Murphy. Mr. Hayden: Woodrow Parfrey. Withers: Richard Peel. Miss Reynolds: Nora Marlowe. Miss Peters: Peggy Rea. Miss Howard: Pauline Drake. Woman: Kathryn Minner. Photographer: Lou Krugman. Mary Murphy’s other TV credits from the ’60s include Perry Mason, Outer Limits, Honey West and The Fugitive. She had a memorable movie appearance with Marlon Brando in The Wild One.

Random fashion note–I like hats.

Woodrow Parfrey appeared in many TV shows and movies. Of note are roles in Planet of the Apes and Back to the Planet of the Apes. He also played Ike Godsey in The Homecoming, the original Waltons special that preceded the series.

Woodrow Parfrey plays Miss Latimer’s boss. Hmm, his office sports the same green paint that pervades the Davis apartment and Bill’s office.

Nora Marlowe also had a Waltons connection—she played the recurring role of Mrs. Flossie Brimmer. And Peggy Rea played Rose on The Waltons. Her other TV credits included the role of Lulu Hogg on The Dukes of Hazzard and regular roles in Step by Step and Grace Under Fire. Both Murphy and Rea died last year.

Fun Facts

WXOY is having a Velvet Vultures festival. Mr. French reads Punch.

Continuity Notes

This is the first appearance of the snooty Withers.

A Withers-ing glance

Bonus Feature

Coloring book, Whitman, 1968

Old-Time Radio Playlist: Edgar Allan Poe

Edgar Allan Poe

October seems like a good time to enter the eerie world of Edgar Allan Poe. Not only is Halloween approaching, but so is the anniversary of Poe’s death. He died on October 7, 1849, at age 40, from unknown causes.

Radio programs presented Poe’s stories often, and it’s easy to see why. They make exciting listening experiences, painting vivid images in listeners’ imagination.

For this playlist, I have tried to gather the widest number of Poe stories from the widest number of radio programs.

Dim the lights, sit back, and lose yourself in the strange world of Edgar Allan Poe.

“And puzzle they did, these French police, and with them the rest of the world.”

“Rue Morgue Mysteries”
Unsolved Mysteries
1949
About this Series: A syndicated 15-minute show, Unsolved Mysteries aired ostensibly true stories and posited solutions to historical mysteries.
Thoughts on this EpisodeUnsolved Mysteries treats Poe’s “The Murders in the Rue Morgue” as a fictionalized account of a true crime, and the show comes up with a different solution to that crime. Poe’s story, history’s first detective story, didn’t have any basis in fact, however. (He did base a later story, “The Mystery of Marie Roget” on a real New York murder.)
Read “The Murders in the Rue Morgue”

“Even after two days at sea, death did not destroy that waxen beauty.”

“The Oblong Box”
The Weird Circle
February 18, 1945
About this Series: Many radio series explored horror and suspense. One thing that differentiated The Weird Circle was its source material; it frequently presented “literary” horror stories, including several of Poe’s tales.
Thoughts on this Episode: This show adds a murderous twist to make Poe’s story even more twisted. It’s an enjoyable adaptation, although the acting gets overwrought at times.
Read “The Oblong Box”

“I determined then to even the score, to revenge the desecration of my name, of my family honor.”

“The Cask of Amontillado”
Hall of Fantasy
January 19, 1953
About this Series: This was another radio show dedicated to tales of suspense and the supernatural.
Thoughts on this Episode: We have no big name stars here, but this is a satisfying dramatization of Poe’s tale of revenge.
Read “The Cask of Amontillado”
“And so it happened, that at the end of a dull, dark, and soundless day in the middle of October, I found myself as the shades of evening drew on, within view of the grim and melancholy House of Usher”


“The Fall of the House of Usher”
Escape
October 22, 1947
About this Series: Escape was “radio’s greatest series of high adventure,” according to John Dunning’s On the Air. It ran from 1947 to 1954, a sister series to the longer-running Suspense.
Thoughts on this Episode: Paul Frees, who plays the narrator, was one of the most prolific voice actors of the 20th century. People unfamiliar with his radio career may know him as Boris Badenov, Burgermeister Meisterburger, or the host ghost in Disney’s Haunted Mansion attraction. His powerful, deep voice brings the dread and decay in Poe’s story vividly to life.
Read “The Fall of the House of Usher”

“You scream with the terror of it! You scream, and scream, and scream!”

“The Premature Burial”
CBS Radio Mystery Theater
January 6, 1975
About this Series: Although not exactly “old-time radio,” CBS Radio Mystery Theater represented the last major gasp of radio drama. The show ran on weeknights from 1974 to 1982. E.G. Marshall hosted, and radio veteran Himan Brown produced the program.
Thoughts on this Episode: Poe’s story barely qualifies as a story at all—it is mostly a rumination on the horror of being buried alive. And Poe sure can ruminate:
It may be asserted, without hesitation, that no event is so terribly well adapted to inspire the supremeness of bodily and of mental distress, as is burial before death. The unendurable oppression of the lungs- the stifling fumes from the damp earth–the clinging to the death garments–the rigid embrace of the narrow house–the blackness of the absolute Night–the silence like a sea that overwhelms–the unseen but palpable presence of the Conqueror Worm–these things, with the thoughts of the air and grass above, with memory of dear friends who would fly to save us if but informed of our fate, and with consciousness that of this fate they can never be informed–that our hopeless portion is that of the really dead–these considerations, I say, carry into the heart, which still palpitates, a degree of appalling and intolerable horror from which the most daring imagination must recoil.

This episode creates a 45-minute story from an incident that is only briefly described in Poe’s story. It does so pretty well, although I found the third act a bit weak. Keir Dullea, best known for his role in 2001: A Space Odyssey, stars in this episode (and many others in the series).

Read “The Premature Burial”

Other Old-Time Radio Playlists

Weird Words of Wisdom: Crisp White Gloves Edition

“Above all, don’t arrive at the breakfast or dinner table, or go downtown shopping, with hair up and guard down. Boys (including fathers and brothers) should think that beauties are born, not made—even though all girls know better!”

The Co-Ed Book of Charm and Beauty, 1962 (1963 printing)

By the Editors of Co-Ed Magazine

About the Book: For the latest entry in my series on vintage advice books for teens, we turn to this Scholastic book club offering, chock full of advice for improving every aspect of a girl’s looks and personality. The fashion section makes me sad that I was born too late for hats and little white gloves, though I’m happy to live without girdles and curlers.

About the Authors: Scholastic published Co-Ed Magazine from 1957 to 1985. According to the New York Times, Co-Ed targeted girls in the home economics field. (Scholastic replaced the magazine with Choices, a classroom magazine for teens of both sexes, which still exists.) As we have seen in the past, Margaret Hauser edited Co-Ed Magazine for many years, and she and other Scholastic personnel often wrote advice books under the pseudonym Gay Head. It’s a shame they didn’t do so with this one—that name would make a lovely complement with the cover image.

Hair setting techniques, The Co-Ed Book of Charm and Beauty

Recommended Amount of Time to Devote to Bathing and Beauty Treatments: An hour each night, extended to two hours once a week and to three or four hours once a month for intensive maintenance.

Fashion Tips

“Short white gloves are never out of place, and there are many occasions when not to wear them would show a lack of good taste. Gloves are a ‘must’ at church, at weddings, and most really dress-up affairs.”

“A movie date, a stroll in the park, a casual gathering of your friends, or a shopping expedition should see you skirted casually, perhaps in the outfits you wear to school. A date that’s somewhat special, a church activity, concerts, the theater, and informal school dances call for a suit or that old stand-by, the basic dress…A basic dress takes to a hat, high heels, and crisp white gloves as well as to flat shoes and an all-purpose cardigan. It can go almost anywhere and be your Sunday best.”

“Special finery must be special all the way, from sparkling earrings and delicate bracelet to petite evening bag and satin, suede, or velvet slippers. Such grand occasions permit you to bare your neck and shoulders; to float in chiffon, taffeta, peau de soie, or fine cotton organdy; to wear a jeweled pin and stars in your eyes!”

“You’ll wear a hat to church, of course, but what’s the rule for other times? It’s good taste to wear a hat when traveling, on ‘downtown’ shopping trips, and whenever you know other women or girls will be wearing them.”

“When you’re within the walls of your home, don’t fall into the ‘nobody will see me’ rut. What about your family? What about the neighbors and store clerks who see you as you dash to the store on a last-minute errand for mother? They’ll view with horror, and remember with regret, the vision of you in pin curls, shirttail flying.”

Recommended at-home wear: Skirts or culottes, pants or Bermudas, with classic shirts or knit tops.

“On occasion, treat (your family) to the pleasure of seeing you in pretty separates or a dress at dinnertime—a ‘must’ if company is present.”

“Ankle socks or knee socks pair with sturdy school shoes, while you’ll want to wear nylons with soft ballet-type flats and little heels. Sneakers are for sports and after school.”

Make-up Tip: “A bit of petroleum jelly applied to eyelids, brows, and lashes, will make the eyes sparkle, lashes look longer, and brows stay neatly in place.” (I hate when my brows wander.)

Fragrance Recommendations by Personality Type

Single Floral: For girls who are “sweet, fragile, feminine.”

Floral Bouquet: For “the All-American girl, crazy for football and hi-fi, happy in the thick of things, always ready for fun.”

Spicy: For girls who are “alert, alive, mad for bright colors and songs with a beat.”

Woodsy-Mossy: For “the born athlete who lives in shorts and sweaters and delights in long walks in the rain.”

Oriental Blend: For “the intense, dramatic type of person who looks great in unusual jewelry, offbeat styles.”

Fruity: For “the quiet kind of girl who thinks more than she talks, enjoys soft music, serious books, daydreaming.” (I’m fruity, apparently.)

Modern Blend: Good if “you’re always on the go, always in the know, a clever girl with lots of zip and a wonderful sense of humor.”

Sample exercises

Clothes and Body Type:

“If you’re over five feet six inches tall and weigh 125 pounds or less, lucky you! You have the fashion model’s ideal figure.”
DOs for this type: Shirt-waist dresses, bold prints (including “coin-size polka dots”), large accessories.
DON’Ts: Too slim skirts, deep V necklines, vertical stripes.

Girls 5’6” and over, weighing “135 or thereabouts” (Anything higher than this is too terrible to contemplate, I guess)
DOs: Vertical and diagonal stripes, middy collars, cardigan tops, three-quarter sleeves, straight or gently flared skirts.
DON’Ts: Princess dress lines, pleated skirts.
“If you’re pining for a print, pick the ‘teeny-weeny’ polka dot, a calico, or baby-check ginghams.”

Girls 5’3” and under, weighing 105 or less
DOs: “The princess line, with its snug-fitting bodice and flared skirt,” straight sheaths, softly tailored suits, delicate buttons and jewelry, knife-pleated skirts.
DON’Ts: Bold-patterned prints, “suitcase-sized handbags.”

Girl 5’3” and under, weighing 115 or more
DOs: Skirts with “gentle gores or center pleats,” narrow self-belts, cardigan-topped outfits.
DON’Ts: Pencil-slim sheaths, ballooning skirts, deep V-necks, box pleats, overlong jackets, “giant trimmings.”

Sitting, Standing, and Walking Attractively

Sitting: “Try the S curve. Knees together (always—even when wearing shorts or slacks), place your thighs diagonally across the seat of the chair, your legs in the opposite direction, and cross your feet at the ankles.”

Standing: “Stand with correct posture, feet parallel. Step back with one foot and point that toe out at a forty-five degree angle. Keep the front foot straight, the heel a couple of inches away from the instep of the back foot, and turn your hips slightly toward the back foot (so that they present a slim line).”

Walking: “Beware of arms swinging, taking too long (or short) a stride, letting your chin lead and your derriere follow as it may…Your ‘bounce’ should be less than two inches…If you consciously let your fingertips brush your skirt as you walk, you’ll avoid that ‘swinging out’ look.”

Fearless Charm Inventory: The book includes inventories to help girls assess their charm levels. To the authors’ credit, they include prejudice, along with shyness and laziness, as a barrier to charm. The original owner of my book was not prejudiced or lazy, just shy.

Goody! Quizzes!: The book also includes quizzes on humor, tact, family interactions, and dating etiquette. Quizzes were always my favorite part of teen magazines. I think the wrong answers on the tact quiz may be a wee bit too obvious, though:

“I should have known you were sick because…”

a.)    You look so awful.

b.)    I missed seeing you around.

c.)    Sally’s been dating your boyfriend.

Final Fun Fact, Courtesy of the Authors: “The word grooming comes from gromet, an old French word meaning ‘servant’ or ‘assistant.’ Before you jump to the wrong conclusion, bridegroom comes from a combination of two Anglo-Saxon words: ‘bryd’ (bride) and ‘guma’ (man)!”